ADHD

ME.  I have it.  Bad.  But I do not take medicine for it.  Which at times I'm sorry I don't.  Mostly because a lot of things wouldn't get lost.  Or get half way done.  Or forget why I went to the store.  Or I'm in my car .. where was I going?  When I start cleaning is when I'm really aware of it.  I will start cleaning .. run down to get the duster .. see dishes in the sink .. start doing dishes .. go to the laundry room to get a washcloth.  Start doing laundry .. forget about the dishes .. go back up to dust.  It's horrible and it probably takes me double the time .. and the energy.

Here's how I cook .. recipe out.  I'm hungry.  Peel an orange... oh yeah, need a rx filled so get the bottle out so that will remind me after I'm done cooking.  Open a magazine to read because for some reason .. I felt it necessary to read an article while cooking.  Then I wonder why I can't remember how many cups of milk I just added.

Other times I don't mind.  Like when I get hyper focused on something ... like exercise .. and can't stop researching and learning and recipes and blogs .. and before I know it, hours have passed.  But it was a good few hours.  I call it productiveness.

Oh .. the other thing I don't like about it is that it makes me absent minded about important things.  I have to keep EVERYTHING in my calendar.  Or I forget.  My phone is constantly giving me dings as reminders.  Or I make lists.  If I think of something that needs attention or done .. I IMMEDIATELY have to jot it down.  I have lists everywhere.

Just one small example that happens almost on a daily basis.  I get to the gym .. check in.  Walk downstairs.  To my locker.  Get stuff I need out of my bag.  I forgot something in car.  Run out to car.  Back to locker room.  Try again.  Walk out on floor.  Forgot my ipod.  Back to locker room.  Back out to floor.  Forgot to pee.  Back to locker room.  Back out to floor.  What was I going to work on?  Walk around gym.  Remember.  Start talking.  Trip on equipment.  Forgot a pen.  Back to locker room.  Back out to floor.  Set stuff out.  Cmon focus Alana.  (which is why I HAVE to write down my workout before I get there or it would NEVER get done).  Talk more.  Finally do workout.  Go do abs.  Where's my water bottle?  Go look where I left it.  Done.  Go to locker room.  Take a shower.  Forget a towel.  Dry off with workout clothes.  Go to put on makeup. Oh.  Left that at home. SERIOUSLY.  Do you know how much time I waste trying to kick a workout?  What takes me 2 hours should take a little over an hour if I were more efficient.

I think it makes me a klutz too.  Yeah .. pretty much I'm going to sit here and blame ADHD on the walls I run in to.  Or gym equipment that falls on top of or in front of me.  Or stairs I trip on.  Bruises on my body .. but it's from not paying attention.

There is SO MUCH in my head .. so much up there.  And you would probably guess there's not very much .. because I don't do much with that SO MUCH in my head.  But trust me.  It's there ... one big unorganized mess.  Like index cards ... a ton of them ... but they got spilled ... and I sometimes can't figure out the order they were supposed to be in.

Until then... life carry's on.

And where's my chicken nugget?  I'm driving.  How can I lose it while I'm driving?

Oh.  There it is.  Right where I left it.