For some reason .. this isn't a family tradition we follow like most do.
We do not all sip hot chocolate and play Christmas music in the background while decorating the tree at night.
This is more what it looks like ...
I struggle getting the boxes out of the garage. Making sure I do not put the boxes on top of the hood of my car and then move them from one side to the other. Note - that's how you get an ugly gash across the entire hood.
Bring the boxes in. Where is everyone? Who wants to help me? Silence. Okay then. Struggle taking the tree out. Curse words flying from my mouth. Except when I'm getting the nativity out. Because that's inappropriate to handle baby Jesus while saying "s***".
Eli comes bouncing in. Whatcha doin? Putting Christmas up. Wanna help? Well call me when you are putting the star on top. Because that's my job. You got it son.
More struggling with the tree. Throw ornaments on as I go. Plug it in. No lights work. And it's the kind where they are attached to the tree. S***. Eli makes another appearance. Here, I'll help you mom. Okay .. start with ornaments. I don't want to. Okay then. Can I do the stick things at the top? Sure. Mom .. why am I the only one that helps you with Christmas? Because you are the only child that cares. And now, you are the only child I really love. Enter Hayley. I'll help. For real? Sure. I might love you too. ELI STOP. ELI YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG. ELI SERIOUSLY? ELI DON'T DO IT LIKE THAT!
Yeah. Pretty much it's jolly.
So tree was up. Decorated. Found lights. Put lights on. Plugged in. Stood back. S***. Only the top half lit up.
I did go buy more lights to put at the bottom. A week later. I brought them home .. put them on. Plugged in. Ahhh .. better. Then they started blinking. Just the bottom half. Well s***. So I left it. But if you lay on the couch. Facing the door. And can only see the blinking out of your perificail vision, it looks like a fireplace is flickering. Yup .. going with that.
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