Thursday, September 19, 2013

shhhhh.....


So I love when I'm home alone.  I don't like to turn the tv on .. I just like the complete silence.  It re-sets me sometimes.  And those moments are pretty rare.  My door is usually revolving.  And the house full of ... well ... just full.

I was having one of these rare afternoons.  Quiet.  Kids were away.  Just me and Sophie ... I had just crawled into my bed to have some me-alone reading time.

When the doorbell rang.  Really?   Then the dog starts barking.  Silence broken.  I tiptoe down the stairs to see who it was.  I can't see out of the peep hole because the stupid wreath is covering it.

All of the sudden I had a rush ... like I was some ninja spy.  I went to the kitchen .. to peek around the corner of the blinds.  It's a man.  A stranger man.  With a clipboard.  So basically that meant it was a stranger man with a clip board who was trying to sell me something.

I hate that.  But then that feeling came over me again.  First of all .. he HAS to know I'm home (perhaps leaving the garage door open .. with my car sitting right in it was a clue) ... so he doesn't go away easily.  My stomach got all giddy.  I felt like I was 10 years old.  Playing hide-n-go seek.  So I was so so sneaky.  The pantry door was open ... so I got in the pantry.  And I hid.  It was SO MUCH FUN!

(notice my black door .. it's worth a shout out)

Then he left.  Walked away.  And so I played spy and took recon pictures of him.




And guess what?  You're welcome (Kim) my neighbor ... because he caught her at the mailbox.  She can't exactly hide.  I felt somewhat guilty ... because by me hiding in the pantry .. that gave her just enough time to pull into the driveway .. get out of her car ... and go to the mailbox.  Before - BAM!

I know this is an awesome story.  But WAIT IT'S NOT OVER (grab some popcorn)...

So then ...I'm gathering chocolate chips and marshmallows while I'm in the kitchen .. to take back to my room ... to get back to my quiet time.

I can't even make this up ...

The doorbell rings AGAIN.  What in the hell?  Are you joking?  Maybe my neighbor saw me in the window and sent the guy BACK.  I mean .. karma and all.

But I froze.  Because I was in the middle of my kitchen.  Where I felt safe.  But now .. fully exposed. So I did what anyone would do.  I dropped.  And crawled over to the window.  Here we go again. Peek over the top ... to two men.  In suits.  With tags.

OH MY GOSH ... GOD WAS NOT HAPPY WITH MY ACTIONS EARLIER!!!! ...
(it was the missionaries)

Was this happening?  What do I do?  I let them ring the doorbell twice more.  My garage!  My car! Did I not learn my lesson?  Instead of marshmallows and chocolate.. I needed to have used that time more wisely.  Like protecting my quiet time by shutting the freaking garage door.

Well .. BACK to the pantry I crawl. And as I'm standing there .. it's no longer like a fun hide and seek game.  It's more like I'm hiding to get out of trouble.  The butterfly fun feeling in my stomach was more like a pit.  There was a second where I was like ... okay .. just answer.  But I froze.  By then it would just be awkward.  Too much time elapsed.  Or maybe I could tell them that Kim called and was hoping for a drive-by.  But digging deeper with a lie.



So I stood until they also walked away.


They probably needed water.  Or food.  Or to awkwardly offer service to my family.  Or to ask why I haven't been at church.  But I'm pretty sure it's that they were "sent" to tell me to be good and answer the door and stop hiding in my pantry.

Anyway ... that was my long story.  And I never got quiet time.  Because then I felt guilty.

But my garage door is shut.



3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hahaha. It was probably me. I miss you a lot and since that Elder you have in the Ward is Samoan it probably sent off his coconut wifi and felt like they needed to see you. I wish you had Sister Missionaries. If you did at least I could attach a hug.

Emile said...

I do the same thing. We have Seventh Day Adventists who come by from time-to-time and want to talk. Problem is, I don't want to talk about why I'm going to hell for worshipping on Sunday instead of Saturday for hours on end. I've been through that before. It leads nowhere. And it wastes my Saturday when I should be watching football.

Alyssa said...

Whenever I don't answer the door I justify it because sometimes people are in the bathroom, right? Just because their car is in the driveway doesn't mean they are "available".